National Hispanic heritage Month: Being LatinX

 

Today is the first day of National Hispanic Heritage Month, a month of celebration that began in 1968. I have never really celebrated it before, though I am Mexican-American, Hispanic, LatinX, or whatever you want to call me. I jokingly say I'm slightly more tan than average. So, what does being Hispanic really mean to me?

Growing up it didn't really mean anything because I was surrounded by a lot of different ethnicities. In middle school that changed a bit when I went to school in Fifth Ward, but heritage and culture weren't things 80s kids really talked about. Then we moved north as I was entering high school, and suddenly I felt like a minority. Bottom line, I wanted to be White, but I never realized how much I denied my heritage until I became an adult.

I took Spanish in high school and my entire family is bilingual, except for me. I was even in the Spanish National Honor Society. But as a teenager, "Mexican" had a bad connotation to me. It meant less, illegal, dirty, foreign, other. I honestly didn't realize I felt that way for many years, but it's something I've been actively working to overcome as an adult.

When I chose the pen name Missy Jane it was purely for convenience. Missy has always been my nickname and Jane is my middle name. But there have been instances of people believing I'm White. The first time that happened I was so surprised, then I really looked at my pen name and though "Duh". It doesn't sound like a Hispanic name. So, now that I plan to venture into other genres of writing I've decided to have a second pen name: MJ Aragon. Aragon was my grandmother's name, and Jane is also in honor of her first name Juanita. I doubt she would've approved of most of what I write under Missy Jane, but hopefully she would have found MJ's stories entertaining.  

A few weeks ago my Missy Jane profile on Facebook was hacked and they set up two-step verification, successfully locking me out. FB has no work around apparently, or at least, they ignored my plight. So, I've now created a new FB profile under the new pen name. Feel free to send me a friend request if you'd like. 

I hope y'all are all celebrating Hispanic Heritage Month with tacos, even if it is a Wednesday.

Sunday Reflection: Who TF Can Create Right Now?

 

It's almost 4 pm on Sunday afternoon, January 10th, and I've only added a handful of words to my current Work in Progress all weekend. Like many people all over the world, I've been scrolling through social media looking repeatedly at images and articles from Wednesday's attempted coup at the U.S. Capitol. I can't help myself. I can't stop. I keep seeing different takes of the same events of that horrendous day and I read every one.

The information hasn't changed, nor has my opinion of the President and his part in this embarrassing and infuriating moment in US history. I've never been a Trump supporter. I've never been a Republican. From the moment Trump decided to run for the 2016 election I've said he's an idiot and an embarrassment to our country. He brought up penis size during one of the first debates, yet people still followed him. He mocked a disabled reporter on live television, and still people voted for him. I'm beyond disgusted. As if that's not bad enough, I live in Texas, firmly in Cruz's district. I absolutely can't stand him. He's just as responsible for the events that have led us to this moment. 

I'm so distracted with no end in sight. When will this BS end? I, like many Americans, am looking forward to the inauguration. But will that be the end of it? What are Republicans even now planning to do? They no longer control Congress. Is that enough to right the wrongs they've done over the past four years to the middle and lower class? To marginalized communities? To the environment? To the LGBTQ+ community? To the families of those dead or dying from Covid-19? To anyone who doesn't have the cash or stocks and bonds to garner their respect and attention? God I hope so.

For now, I'm writing this post so I can feel like I've written some words this weekend. It's the best I can do for now. I'm listening to some heavy, angry music to get that energy out. Once I'm done, I plan to switch to classical and try to write an actual story. If the words won't come, I'm going to snuggle with my cat and watch the rain.

Obligatory New Year's Post 2021

 

For every person on this planet, 2020 will be a year that lives in infamy. I honestly don't know a single person that didn't suffer in some way due to the pandemic, and all that it wrought. Today begins a new chapter in all our lives. Hopefully, a much more positive chapter. One we will be a little sad to see end this time next year.

In 2020 there were a few changes in my family. Daughter #3 decided to end her college career for now but stayed in Denton. Daughter #2 moved back home. Our son was officially renamed in the eyes of the state of Texas and we're still getting everyone else officially on board. My husband and I were able to work from home for a few weeks, but for the most part still had to go out in public every workday. We were lucky to keep our jobs and have not forgotten it for a second.

My son's box turtle disappeared, and I had to say goodbye to my beloved cat Cheetoh on the same day my son's tortoise died. At nearly the end of the year daughter #1's girlfriend's cat died of cancer. It was a rough year on us for pets.

In my writing life there were some positives. I finally finished book three of my Gargoyle Masters series. It's being edited and I already have the new book cover ready to go. I'm hoping for a March release date. I won NaNoWriMo for, I think, only the second time of my life, though I've been attempting it for many years. My long neglected blog saw a lot of activity from me in September because of a 30 Day Challenge hosted by Angela James that kicked my writing butt back into gear. Overall, it was the most productive I've been in a long time. 

So, what about this year? Here are twenty-one things (in no particular order) that I'm looking forward to in this new year:

1. Empty Nesting. I love my children with a sometimes fanatical intensity that drives them nuts, but I've been taking care of them for nearly twenty-seven years. In the Fall we will be taking my son to Tulane University and beginning our Empty Nest days. Daughter #2 might still be living with us, but she'll be 24 by then and no longer needs me to the degree she did as a child. I'm looking forward to having a little bit more time for myself.

2. New Orleans. On that note, with our son in New Orleans for school we'll have a lot more opportunity to visit one of my favorite places to visit. We've promised him to remember to swing by and say hi while we're in town, lol.

3. In person book events. I might be overly optimistic, but I have at least four in-person events planned for 2021. 

4. The first is All the Books in March in Houston. Hopefully, it will be safe enough to still have this event at that time. If not, the next is in May. Fingers crossed.

5. The May event is The Lone Star Book Festival.

6. Comicpalooza is expected to also make a return in Houston in May.

7. At some point Copperfield Books will reschedule it's Annual Author Fair.

8. In October, Authors in the Alamo City is expected to still take place.

9. Publishing new books. As stated above I will definitely be releasing the third Gargoyle Masters book this year. 

10. I also plan to rerelease at least two of my contemporary erotics that were previously published by Ellora's Cave. I also have a completely new contemporary erotic romance I'm working to have out soon. It's book three in my Erotic Arts series that began with Erotic Images.

11. Reading new books. With the new year comes new books from my favorite authors. One of the ones I'm most looking forward to is Wild Sign by Patricia Briggs. It's book 6 in her Alpha and Omega series which I highly recommend if you enjoy urban fantasy. Even if you're not sure, Patricia Briggs is one of the best story tellers I've ever come across. Well worth the read no matter which series you try.

12. I'm also looking forward to Nalini Singh's newest Psy-Changeling book Last Guard. Though waiting until July is going to be painful.

13. Christine Feehan is releasing a new book in each of three of her series that are on my auto-buy list, and I honestly don't know which I'm looking forward to the most: Reckless Road, Lightning Game, or Shadow Storm.

14. Seeing family again. I'm really hoping by October it's safe to visit my mom. Since she lives in San Antonio I'm hoping to see her when I attend Authors in the Alamo City. Even if I have to put on a hazmat suit, I want to see my mom in person.

15.Travel. It might still be a while before it's safe to really travel and have a vacation somewhere, but we already know we're heading to Louisiana in August because of my son. He is also having top surgery this year which will necessitate a trip to Austin where daughter #1 lives. Then there will be those in-person book events. One is in Seguin, TX, which I've driven through more times than I can count. However, I don't think I've ever actually stopped there. It will be nice to road trip again.

16. New cat? When our son leaves for college he will be taking one of the cats with him. Claire really only loves him and barely tolerates the rest of us, so she gets to go to Tulane too. That means Jessie will be all alone in our house during the workday. So, we will most likely look into getting her a companion shortly after Claire leaves for college.

17. Eating out. Though we've continued to order food from area restaurants in order to support them, we haven't eaten in a restaurant in a while. There was one breakfast we attempted in an outdoor courtyard a month or so ago where we were attacked by bees. I told my husband it was a sign that we should've continued to get our food to go. I'm looking forward to being able to sit in a restaurant again. Hopefully it will happen this year.

18. Movies, and other indoor entertainments. Will we be able to safely watch a movie in a theater in 2021? I hope so. I'm honestly more concerned with going to a musical performance or play. No matter what it is, I truly hope it's safe to support the arts in person this year.

19. Camping. Before our rainy camping trip in December it had been many years since we'd loaded up the tent and headed into the woods. We all missed it. Being that it's one of the safe things we can do during a pandemic, I'm looking forward to more camping in 2021.

20. Photography. I've been taking photos since middle school when my father bought me a Canon AE-1. It's a hobby I haven't indulged in much the past couple of years. However, I plan to take my DSLR with me a lot more in 2021. There are so many great photographs I've missed because the phone is not always a great substitute.

21. Everything. 2020 was such a dumpster fire that there's just nowhere to go but up at this point. If you follow my social media you know where I stand politically. I can't wait for Biden and Harris to take office. I'm almost giddy with relief at the thought of the changing political climate in the US that is coming. I know things aren't going to improve overnight, but it's definitely a step in the right direction.

Sunday Reflection: A Decision About My Writing

 I signed my first publishing contract in the summer of 2008. Before that acceptance email that completely changed the way I viewed myself when it came to writing, I basically just wrote as stories came to me. I wrote because I wanted to know the rest of the story that was playing through my mind. I wrote for myself. The first time someone told me they liked what I had written I was shocked. These crazy stories I make up in my mind weren't supposed to actually go anywhere or do anything for anyone. Not even me.

Now it's been over ten years since my first book landed on the shelves of Barnes and Noble and I'm completely indie-published. I don't have a company to help me edit, publish, cover, and promote my stories. I'll be completely honest, there are days where it doesn't feel as if all the work is worth it. Does anyone care if I ever publish another book? Is anyone actually waiting for my 3rd Gargoyle book, 4th Archangel book, 2nd Shapeshifter book, or any of the erotic stories I have yet to republish? Maybe, maybe not. I've had to really think about this over the past few months because independent publishing is not cheap. I promised my husband at the very beginning of this journey that I would only spend money I make on my books on book-related things. I lied. Luckily, he's a wonderful man with a great job, and I work fulltime as well. However, I've had to take things very slowly with anything new that requires not only a book cover (of which I am barely capable), but also a real editor rather than a free Beta reader. This, my dear readers, is only one of the reasons I don't have more books available for purchase right now.

At the beginning of the year I had great hopes of having the third Gargoyle book out by the summer. Then Covid-19 happened and I've found it very hard to concentrate on writing. The plethora of blog posts over this past months are my way of getting back into the swing of things. I'm hoping oiling my writing muscles in this way will bring my mojo back. I think it's working. I certainly am not having any trouble writing the blog posts. But even once I get the book done I still have to pay for an editor. A couple of months ago I invested in another beautiful cover from the very talented Kanaxa. I can't wait to share it with y'all, but that's not happening until I have a release date. I have to finish the book first.

So, what was my great epiphany about my writing? What is the decision I've come to as mentioned in the blog title? I've decided to stop worrying about trying to keep up with the expectations other authors have for themselves and to be more realistic in the expectations I set for myself. I've decided to start writing for ME again. I still want to keep my readers happy. I love y'all and am completely humbled every time I sell a book. However, I can't live under that pressure right now. I'm going to once again look at each book as a story I want to tell rather than a possible source of income. Luckily, I have the ability to do that because as mentioned above my husband and I both work. I'm going to stop looking at my author brand as a business (at least for the moment) and consider it an expression of myself I want to share with the world. I hope you will join me on my journey.

Hispanic Heritage Month 2020

 Happy Hispanic Heritage Month! September 15th through October 15th is Hispanic Heritage Month. Why doesn't it start on the first? I have no idea. To be honest, this is the first year I've publicly acknowledged it because I usually don't know it's coming and forget about it once it's here. I have an odd relationship with my heritage, but the fact is I'm proud to say I'm Mexican American, born and raised in Texas. 

I wasn't always proud of my heritage. In fact, I spent my entire childhood and adolescence wishing I was white. This is a fact that I've only come to realize, and come to terms with, in the past few years and I feel like I've missed out on so much of my rich culture.

The photo to the left is of my mama at an art installation I took her to for Mother's Day a few years back. It featured the Virgin de Guadalupe, a symbol that holds a special place in my mama's heart. As a teenager, I wouldn't have wanted to attend such an event. I rebelled against learning conversational Spanish. I never dressed or spoke in a way that would reflect my Mexican heritage. Looking back I can't say exactly why I felt that way, but being Mexican always felt like a stigma. I saw various things in my youth that led me to that, but there were a lot of wonderful things too, and I can only blame my perception of what was beautiful and accepted for missing out on that part of my culture.

I was raised on the north side of Houston in a diverse area, but mainly Hispanic. For middle school I was sent to a magnet school in a predominantly African American area but there were still different cultures around me. However, my closest friends were white. Once I hit high school we moved north to the suburbs and I was in a predominantly white school. It was a completely different social, economic, and cultural climate. I wanted to fit in like any teenager. I wished daily that I'd been born white, but that idea was never so simple in my head. I wished I was blond. I wished I was tall and thin. I wished I could wear the same clothes as my white female classmates and look the same way they did. But still I didn't realize I wanted to be white. I begrudgingly took Spanish class because I knew I could ace it, and I did. I was a member of the Spanish National Honor Society without being able to hold a conversation with my grandma in Spanish. I was a fraud. I felt like an impostor. 

It's been a few years since I've embraced being Hispanic, but eleven or so years ago when deciding on a pen name I didn't think twice about using Missy Jane. My real name is Melissa and Missy is a nickname. My real middle name is Jane. I joked that it would be easier for me to remember, but was that all? I can't help but wonder if I was subconsciously suppressing my roots. Was I trying to hide my brown skin with an Anglo-sounding name? Perhaps. If so, it wasn't something I thought about until the past few months when more and more Latinx authors have become known to me. They're all over Twitter proudly proclaiming their heritage. They put it in their books and on their beautiful book covers. Once again I feel like a fraud. I almost never write a blond character, but they do tend to have pale skin. I've started to make them darker. I've started to add a kink to their hair. I've started to hear Spanglish as I write and yearn to include it whenever a conversation happens that I know could happen in my own family. 

I can't promise that I will always get it right. I can't promise that I will be a good representative of my Mexican heritage. But I'm going to make more of an effort. I'm proud to say I'm Latina, Mexicana, Hispanic, Chicana, any one of the numerous words that means my skin is naturally brown, my black hair is naturally curly, and in the summer I wear chanclas.

On Life in General

This has been a challenging summer. In June I turned 45, during a pandemic, where celebrating with extended family wasn't possible. My immediate family and I went to the beach and had a great day staying away from everyone. One kid officially became a High School Senior, while another kid officially became a college graduate with a Bachelor's degree. And finally, Hurricane Season officially began.

In July I lost one of my furbabies (pictured above). Cheetoh adopted us in 2015. She just showed up one day as a scrawny stray meowing in the hopes we'd feed her. I fed her and loved her and fed her some more. If you follow me on Instagram you're probably very familiar with her antics. I loved her so very much, but she developed Diabetes without us realizing it until it was too late to reverse the effects.

 Along the way I also returned to working in the office instead of at home. Unfortunately, I have no real choice in the matter even though I disagree with it since I can completely do my job from home (except checking the mail on Mondays). However, it keeps me active when working from home definitely didn't. I also republished an erotic short story originally released by Ellora's Cave called Educating Macey. It's always been one of my favorites because no matter how many times I read it, that opening scene always makes me laugh. I have it available indefinitely for free.

 At the beginning of August I went ahead and commissioned the artwork for the third book in my Gargoyle Masters series. The book is only about halfway done, but having the cover makes it more real to me and inspires me to write more. Writing has been a grueling process lately. I need all the inspiration I can get. 

This past week was spent preparing for Hurricane Laura. It was a sobering experience that I've been through too many times, and it never gets easier. Luckily, Houston was spared a direct hit and we've only seen a bit of rain so far. I hate to even count my blessings knowing our neighbors in Louisiana were put through the wringer. I just hope once the clean-up begins it goes quickly and there is minimal loss of life. 

September will be upon us very soon and with it comes a three day weekend right off the bat. I've also joined an accountability group that begins in September. My goal is to get back to daily writing. If all goes well, Born of the Forbidden will be out before Christmas. 

I hope all of you are doing well in these crazy, uncertain, and harrowing times. Please vote, wear a mask, and treat others as you would wish to be treated. Remember that Black Lives Matter now more than ever as we see so much hate being spewed across the country. And support all marginalized voices in the arts.

My son and husband were kind enough to hang my hummingbird feeder outside my (dirty) office window.

Writing to Write

I'm the first to admit that I'm a terrible businesswoman. I'm also very lucky and hardworking. The luck comes in the form of a hardworking husband who doesn't mind that I spend money on books. The hardworking part of me takes care of the rest. What does this mean for me as a writer? Well, I don't write to make money.

This might be considered a good thing for most things, but it's a bad thing when it comes to actual production. I feel no rush to get books published. I write when the urge to write takes me, and hopefully I have time to write at those moments too. 

When I began this crazy journey to be a published author I wrote the stories I wanted to read. That hasn't changed. However, now that I'm not under deadline with a publisher I find myself writing those stories in my head more often than on my computer. I can't even list how many different stories I've written in my head. So, lately actual writing has taken a backseat even though I have at least four series to finish. 

I'm also trying to quiet my daily life enough to hear my characters' voices again. I'm going to start carving out more time to concentrate on my worlds. I'm also going to try blogging more because the act of writing in any capacity helps keep the wheels spinning.

I would also like to point out that just because I don't depend on my royalties to eat doesn't mean I'm cool with anyone stealing my books. Piracy sucks, so don't do that.  

Another struggle right now is deciding which stories to finish. I'm decent at starting books and getting close to the middle, but then the ending eludes me. A lot of times that's because another idea pops in my head and takes over before I decide how the first one should end. What I really need to know is: are erotic stories in just as much demand as non-erotic romance? I'm writing mostly paranormal with a medium heat level but I have contemporaries started that are highly erotic. What to do, what to do? I also have eleven books that were with EC and are now fully my property again that are collecting dust. 

So, overall I've been a very lazy author. I very much want to write. I just need to remember to actually publish books too. Maybe someone needs to come over and delete spider solitaire from my computer. Couldn't hurt.

Happy 2016!

Happy 2016! I hope all of my readers had a fabulous end to 2015 and so far a great New Year. I finally got back into the writing groove late in 2015. I have an idea of what caused my general funk and hopefully that will never happen again. We shall see. So far things are moving along well and I've been inspired to write on multiple fronts.

2016 will bring in three releases for me. The sequel to Born of Stone: Born of Magic, will be out in the summer. Keep your eyes peeled for the cover reveal. My third Archangel book will be out this year as well, but no dated pinned down yet. Also, They Call Me Death is currently undergoing a major make-over. My initial thought was to give it a minor make-over with a basic re-edit. However, my new editor is AMAZING and has my creative wheels spinning like crazy with his initial feedback. So, there may be some major rewrites there after all.

More news: Ellora's Cave will be putting my Love Beyond Barriers series in print this year. I'm currently trying to think up titles for the two paperbacks. Have an idea? Shoot me an email or comment below. Also, if you own the series and remember seeing a typo, PLEASE let me know. I plan to spend this coming weekend rereading them myself.

On the personal front: I decided not to bother making actual resolutions this year. I'm sick of feeling like a failure in mid-February. So instead I'm going to continue to try making smarter lifestyle choices. I actually started this a couple of months ago. There have been many hiccups so not a lot of visual progress yet, but I'm hopeful. I can say that writing again feels so good, it definitely has me in the right mindset. 

That's it for now but stay tuned for more news. I'm hoping to set up some signings around my new release dates. Want me to come to your city? Please let me know.

And Now it Begins Again...

For anyone who has been paying attention to my Goodreads activity the past few days, you may have noticed an increase in books read. I decided to take a break from writing after the marathon I put myself through in August to finish the sequel to Trusting an Angel. That book will soon be in edits and I am hoping to have a sequel to Born of Stone complete by the end of this year as well. But I was feeling a bit burned out creatively, and definitely physically. I've been having problems with my right arm from elbow to palm, and it scares the hell out of me. I spend all day at the weekly job on the computer, so writing when I get home isn't the ideal activity for me. But I'm working on solutions to take some stress off my hand. My husband has endured three hand surgeries (yes, three) and I really don't want to have to go through what he's been through. So, I'm taking it easy and giving my hands as much of a typing break as I can, when I can. The only problem is, the muse is bugging me again and I can hear the Gargoyle Masters clamoring for their mates. Time to give them what they want.

Where Did March Go?

I just realized I didn't post a single thing to this blog in March. It's April already?! My god, where did March go? I've been working and doing the mom/wife thing mostly for the past few weeks. I did begin the sequel to my Gargoyle book, which will be out from Samhain at the end of May.

I'm also preparing for a couple of appearances in May. One will be at the Romantic Times convention in NOLA from May 14th-17th. The other will be at Comicpalooza in Houston. I'm really excited about both and hope to have lots of new stuff to share with everyone even before those appearances. We'll see.

For now, I'm just writing as I can fit it into the crazy mom/wife/work schedule I hold each day.

Want to keep up with my news? I'll have a newsletter soon that will go out when I have new releases or other exciting things to share. The first one is in the works but you can sign up here:

http://eepurl.com/QZ4Hn

NaNo Week Two Update

Today marks week two of NaNoWriMo. My word count should be sitting somwhere around 25,004 by the end of the day. I'm too embarrassed to admit exactly what it is, but will say it's only a fraction of that count. Life, as usual, has gotten in the way of my writing. I'll admit I could be doing better with my time management skills. Hopefully the second half of the month will run more smoothly. We shall see.

And you? Are you writing like crazy this month too? If so, I wish you the best of luck with your word count.

It's NaNo Time Again!

What time is it? It's NaNoWriMo time!!

What the hell am I talking about? Well, November is officially National Novel Writing Month. So, every year lots of crazies like me spend the entire month attempting to write a 50,000 word novel. There's a lot of inspiration, caffeine, frustrated tears, and social media hysterics along the way, but many of us accomplish the feat. Last year I missed it by two days. This is my year. I can feel it!

Will you attempt NaNo this year? Don't worry, anyone can do it. You don't have to be published or even think of yourself as a writer. Just commit to a certain word count every single day. Mine is 2,000 but to hit the goal you really only need to do 1,667 (aprox.). Every day you can add your word count to the tracker on the website and it will show how far you are from the goal. You can even add buddies to see how they're doing on their goals. Nothing like healthy competition to get the creative juices flowing. I've already written at least one novel during NaNo that eventually got published. There's no reason you can't too.

One thing to remember is November is just for WRITING. The editing happens in December, or whenever you can stand to look at your manuscript again. It's okay if it sits in a file for a couple of months. Just GET IT WRITTEN in November and you've won NaNo! I'll be posting updates to Twitter at least weekly, but hopefully more often than that. With my new work schedule this year's going to be a little tricky, but I'm determined. So, will you join me? There's really no good reason not to. Good luck!!

A Rare Thing

I got today off from work, which is rare during the week. I'm finding the perks of this new job faaaar outway the added commute and toll road fees. So far today I've taken two kids to the doctor for annual physicals (yeah very late, I know), made lunch for me and one kid who stayed home sick (damn allergies), read part of a book, and am updating my poorly neglected blog. I plan to do a final read through of the manuscript I finished yesterday so I can send it to my EC editor. This book is supposed to be a sequel to Eroitc Images, though they will be stand alones as well. 

After that, if there's daylight left I just might go for a walk. It's wonderfully cool outside and Houston's high humidity is a little less today. So far, I'm loving this rare day off!

Here I Am!

My wonderful, faithful readers, I owe you an apolgy for being MIA the past few months. I've played a little on FB and Twitter, but not nearly the norm of the past couple of years. 

I've changed jobs twice since July and rearranging my schedule has been a bit hectic. My daughters and I just (this morning) finished the JDRF Walk for a Cure, which has taken up a lot of my time as well. To those of you who donated to our team, THANK YOU! We sincerely appreciate it. I'll probably start planning for next year's walk in late spring so keep it in mind if you'd like to join us.

Next up: NaNo! November 1st marks the beginning of National Novel Writing Month. Me, along with thousands of other masochists, attempt to write a 50,000 word novel within thirty days. It's funny, exhausting, eye-opening, and frustrating all at the same time. You should join in!

Along with NaNo, November marks my return to Allen, TX for Readers n'Ritas. This year one of my all-time favorite authors will be there, Sherrilyn Kenyon! I've had the honor of meeting her twice before but still look forward to seeing her again.

So, as you can see there's never a dull moment in my house. NaNo will also be my return to a regular writing schedule. After all, who needs sleep, right?

It's September!

September has arrived and with it almost nothing on my writing calendar. I don't have any signings, releases, guest posts, etc, scheduled so far this month. But that's probably a good thing since I'm still trying to get used to my new work schedule. I do plan to attend Kerrelyn Sparks' signing at Murder by the Book at the end of the month. I also will be preparing for the JDRF Walk for  Cure. So don't worry, I'm not going to be completely silent this month.

If you'd like to meet me, make plans to attend Readers n' Ritas in Allen, TX in November. I'm hoping to have a new book out by then but I don't have a release date for what's in edits right now yet. I'm working on some hot stuff for Ellora's Cave and just finished edits for my part of an anthology from Just Ink Press. The first release in my gargoyle trilogy is also in edits with Entangled. 

What do you have cooking in September?

And Yet Another Direction

From time to time I might talk about my personal schedule. The fact is I'm a mother of four, I work part-time, and I write as often as I'm able. Back when I first started writing seriously I was working full-time. I would write only on my one hour lunch breaks, and I was able to complete a few novellas that way. Now my schedule is about to change again. I got a new job.

It's nothing glamorous but will take up a good chunk of my day. I'll be working in the morning until early afternoon Monday through Friday. I'm still keeping my part-time job too since that one is only every other weekend. So, what does this mean for my writing? Well, it doesn't mean I'm going to stop. That's for certain. However, I'm going to have to get creative on when I get to write. I'll have the weekends I don't work and I should have late afternoons and evenings. The good thing is my husband works nights. The bad thing is I still have to make dinner for the kids every night.

Overall there shouldn't be a serious decline in how much novel writing I get done. I just have to rearrange my schedule. However, it might affect my online presence a bit. Evenings are when I'm usually playing on Twitter and Facebook. Though I probably still will while writing, I'll have to keep it to a minimum to get any real writing done. We shall see. I just wanted to warn y'all that I might seem to disappear for a few days at a time. Especially when I first start next week.

Getting Lost in the Shuffle

When I first started writing to get published there was still a stigma against self-publishing. Any "vanity press" caused warning signs to flash in my head. Skip ahead just a few short years and now publishing your own work is the new black. I have absolutely nothing against it and know many authors who have been very successful at it. However, I've decided it's not for me at this time. 

So, what does that mean for me as a small press author? I'm not published through the big six but I do have contracts with three different publishers. All three are well known in the Romance industry and have NY Times Best Selling author's in their lists. I'm very happy being a part of all three but what does that mean for me? Not much lately it seems. Even though I've been more successful on having new releases this year than any previous year, my sales are down. Is it because of my writing? I've no idea.

To be honest I feel I'm getting lost in the shuffle. There are so many authors and books to choose from. I know I'm just one of millions. I don't get many reviews so don't know if my writing just sucks. The few reviews I've had and some reader feedback leads me to believe it doesn't. What I do feel is there is such a push to support "Indie" authors, and so many readers stuck on buying paperbacks from the big six that authors like me are falling through the cracks. The biggest problem is I don't know how to fix this.

Like most authors I do a lot of online promotion for my books. I've got a site and blog (duh) and I'm on Facebook nearly all day every day. I know I'm often preaching to the choir though, as a lot of my interaction is with other authors. I don't really mind. Authors are readers too, right? I know I am. But there comes a point where I have to draw the line on self-promotion. I have to spend time writing too, plus I don't want to spam anyone. So, I'm just going to keep doing my thing and hope my writing speaks for itself.

Writer vs Author

Whenever I mention to someone that I'm an author I don't always call myself that. Sometimes I say writer instead without really thinking about it. The two words are pretty interchangeable in my mind. However, I've noticed quite a difference in the reactions of those I tell based on which term I choose.

When I say I'm a writer or that I write it's usually met with a smile and nod of understanding, but no real interest. The listener usually moves on to the next topic of discussion without really acknowledging what I've just said. That's okay by me. To be honest, when I'm meeting or talking to someone as myself (Melissa rather than Missy) I'm perfectly okay with not discussing my writing. I don't push it on other people or even say much about it unless they show a genuine interest. I realize not many people are willing to admit they read the genres I write, so I give them an out by not making it a big part of our conversation.

On the flip side, when I say I'm an author the reaction is vastly different. Many times the person shows surprise and they ask about my books. How many have I written? What genre are they? Are they self-published? I answer the questions honestly and as succinctly as possible. What can I say, I'm not the best at self-promotion. I do offer a bookmark with my info if they seem to be genuinely interested rather than just being polite. 

I'm not bothered by either reaction. I just find it interesting that the two words, which mean essentially the same thing, garner such different reactions from people. I rarely say I'm a published author, and almost never that I'm multi-published, even though both are true. There's really no reason. Again, I'm not so great at self-promotion. 

Do the two terms have different meanings for you? If so, why and how?

You Might Be An Erotic Romance Author If...

1. While watching your kid during JROTC drills your camera keeps straying to the Marine inspectors.
2. Every time you pass a street named Penns Grove you see Penis instead.
3. The highlight of your day is whatever hot bodied photos you can find on Facebook.

Yes, I'm sorry to say I'm guilty of all of the above and probably more. But hey, it makes for good inspiration. ;-)

Switching Heads

I've decided to do something I've never done before, and to be honest I'm a little nervous. I'm writing the sequel to Day Shift (tentatively titled Blood Rush) from the hero's POV rather than the heroine. First person certainly isn't new for me but writing from a man's perspective is. I've considered it a few times, and written third person stories where part of the story is from the guy's frame of mind (Resignation), but writing totally in Greg's head is very...different. So far I'm just over 3,000 words in and I think it's going well. So, here's a little teaser. Let me know what you think.

Prologue

The sound of flesh striking flesh woke me before the stinging slap burned my cheek. I gasped in a lungful of air that made me cough it right back out. I was dying, which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, considering. I’d had a good run, saved a few lives, pissed off a few people and left as little damage behind as possible. Collateral damage they called it, but complete and total fuckery is what it really amounted to. In my line of work, losing an innocent kid to the sick fucks currently beating the shit out of me had happened on occasion. I’d be damned if I let it happen again.

“You awake, sheep fucker?”

Oh yeah. It had happened again and now I was stuck with the assholes responsible.

“Fuck you,” I croaked back.

I didn’t even recognize my own broken voice. They’d starved and beaten me, left me without water or blood for days, then beat me again.

The vampire before me was a big, beefy fucker with meat-cleaver hands. They hurt like fuck when he hit me but I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of flinching.

“No thanks. I heard you like to fuck sheep. No telling what I might catch.”

He thought that was not only clever, but fucking hilarious. I watched through swollen eyes as he laughed and reared back to swing again.

“Enough, Marco. We don’t wish him dead…at this time.”

The cultured voice that cut off Marco’s fun belonged to the biggest sick fuck of them all, the man I’d been sent in to watch. Some days I wished I wasn’t a cop so I could do more than watch men like him.

“Yes, sir,” Marco said before stepping back.

His boss, the leader of the Blood Martyr’s southern division, Jonathan Crosby, stepped forward into the ring of light given off by a single harsh bulb hanging from the ceiling.

“You have no idea what you have done, stepping into the hornet’s nest, Mr. Parsons.”

“Detective…Parsons…you sick…fuck.”

He smirked before throwing a glance over his shoulder at Marco.

“He does have a mouth on him. Perhaps it’s time we did something about that.”

Marco chuckled as Crosby stepped back into the shadows again. They had already whipped me, burned me, shocked me and tried to drown me. What the fuck could they possibly do next?

No sooner had the thought crossed my mind when the most glorious scent filled my nostrils. Sweet and fresh, like newly baked bread, I inhaled greedily despite the pain n my chest.

“Ah yeah, lookit, boss. He’s getting hungry.”

I knew the joy in Marco’s voice couldn’t be a good thing, but I’d been too long without human food or blood to care. I was hungry, fucking starving to be honest, and whatever they had brought into the room smelled like heaven.

“We’ll see how long this hungry sheep-lover can resist a little human sustenance.”

And then I knew what they’d brought.

Marco moved back into the shadows with Crosby, pushing a bundle of cloth towards the chair I was strapped into. I looked down at the trembling blanket, inhaling its sweet scent no matter how hard I fought it. My fangs ached and my stomach growled, I wouldn’t be able to hold out much longer. Crosby leaned forward and snatched back the cloth to reveal a pretty little human girl with bright red hair. Her face was puffy from crying and her eyes were tightly shut.

“There you are, Parsons,” Crosby said. “I know you’re hungry and I know you want to prove your loyalty to the Martyrs. Here’s your chance to satisfy both.”

Hunger crawled through my gut like a snake full of venom until all I could think about was how sweet the first drop of warm blood would taste. I shook my head and breathed through my mouth to escape her enticing scent.

She’s only four and her name is Libby.

I repeated her information in my mind like a mantra as I continued to shake my head back and forth.

“No? No?” Now Crosby was pissed. “How about we make a deal then, hmm? I’ll take this little sheep back to her parents and bring you a bigger catch. Oh, but there’s just one thing. The other treat I have in store isn’t human.”

He cackled like a B-movie villain as the door swung open again. A gasp sounded like a gunshot in the room, but even that brief sound had the hair rising on my arms.

“No. No! Motherfuckers! That better not be my sister, Crosby, or I’ll—“

“You’ll what, Parsons? Run back to the chief of police? Tell the media?” he laughed. “Don’t be an idiot. You’ll drink from one of these offerings to prove your loyalty or your sister dies. It’s that simple.”

I closed my eyes though they’d barely been open from the swelling of the numerous beatings over the past few days. My sister sniffed, the scent of her tears acrid in my nose. I had no choice. All I could really do was make it as quick and painless for the little human girl as possible. I straightened against the hardwood chair and looked up at Crosby.

“Give her to me.”

He smiled, showing dried blood on his teeth, and that image followed me into years of nightmares.